Your processor does not develop enough heat.
I had to use hammer to free stuck disk drive heads.
Only people with names beginning with ‘A’ are getting mail this week (a la Microsoft)
Fluorescent lights are generating negative ions. If turning them off doesn’t work, take them out and put tin foil on the ends.
BOFH excuse of the day: HTTPD Error 4004 : very old Intel cpu – insufficient processing power